How infertility affects your partner

Diagnosing male infertility

The diagnosis of male infertility begins with a medical history and physical exam by a physician, preferably a specialist with experience or one who specialises in male infertility, such as a Reproductive Endocrinologist.

Often, there are no visible signs of male infertility. That’s why it’s important for you as a couple, to have an open discussion with your doctor, urologist or a fertility specialist.

Your partner needs to tell his doctor about his medical history, including past illnesses, medications, and surgeries. He also needs to give current information about his lifestyle habits, diet, exercise, and any drug or alcohol abuse. His doctor may order a semen analysis (SA). This is the single most important test for male fertility.

Blood tests to look for hormone imbalances, medical conditions, or genetic issues may also be ordered.

Male infertility and his manhood

Women often find it helpful to discuss health challenges like infertility. Men, on the other hand, seem to get by just fine without talking about these things.

Here are five reasons why:

1. Men are encouraged to be strong. He can suppress his feelings about infertility because pain and weakness are not socially acceptable.
2. Men are encouraged to provide for their families. He might feel like a failure for not providing you with a child.
3. Men must be in control at all times. By not fathering a child he feels like he has let you, and others, down.
4. A man often wants to have descendants to carry on his genes and the family name. He is disappointed that he is not fulfilling his end of this bargain.
5. Men are encouraged to be highly sexual, with virile sex organs. Infertility affects his manhood and he may worry that he is less of a man because he is infertile.

As your partner struggles with these beliefs and wanting to stay strong, he may be less likely to talk about his feelings and seek infertility support.

Men need infertility support, too

Close to ten percent of all couples experience infertility at some point, with male infertility contributing to half of all couple’s fertility problems. While men may be less likely to openly seek infertility support, they are coping with infertility too.

As you continue on your fertility journey, encourage your male partner to open up, take care of his physical and emotional health, and find helpful outlets for coping with infertility.

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