What I didn't know I would need for my new baby

I am very much a believer in “what I don’t know could fill a book” so I would love to literally fill a book with the things I’ve learned since having a baby, but since I can barely get to the things on my current “To Do” list, a series of blog posts put together on my cell phone as I feed her will have to suffice.

I am a lady of lists and I used those lists to stay relatively sane in the run up to having my baby girl. I was recently asked by one of my favourite people from University what I considered to be the “must have” items she would need for her first baby. I had a list for this; one I had created two years ago when my best friend fell pregnant and that I had updated when my sister fell pregnant and then again in my pregnancy. When I looked at it before sending it, I realised how much of it was unnecessary or hadn’t worked for me and so I updated it once again, adding notes as I went.

What makes this list different to all the others I’ve stumbled across is that it is purely from my experience. It is important to remember this is subjective and every mom you meet will have their own version of it (probably directly contradicting mine).

Every baby is different and what works like a charm for one will send another over the edge of hysteria. I hope this helps all the same…

For the Nursery

Cot
Compactum
Duvet inners, covers, pillow
Change table mattress (for changing baby on hard surfaces)
Campcot with changing table: This is the best thing we own. You could probably survive without any other big buys until baby is older.
Campcot mattress: I was surprised at how reasonably priced a quality baby-safe mattress was.
Sleep Positioner: I have one that is two wedges attached using velcro, so it is easy to adjust as they grow. Babies should sleep on their side only, preferably alternating sides after each feed.
Fitted wedge pillow: This is especially great for babies who suffer from reflux.
Fitted waterproof sheet: With this kind of item I would recommend at least 2, so if one is in the wash you have a spare.
Mosquito net: I would definitely recommend buying one of these, especially if you are due in summer.
Night light: A low light for night time changes and breastfeeding without waking baby (or hubby) completely..

General baby stuff

Burp cloths or towelling nappies: My little girl tends to spit up a lot and I have approximately 25 towelling nappies that I send to the laundromat twice a week.
U-shaped maternity pillow: The maternity one is the best thing I bought; I used it for back support on the couch, belly support when I slept, and I still use it for breastfeeding and it supports my baby when she sits.
Nappies: Huggies New Baby or Pampers Premium Care. Every baby is different, but these are the two top brands and least likely to give rashes.
Wetwipes
Bum cream: Vaseline serves this purpose unless baby gets a rash. Sudocrem seems to be the best for standard rashes. If baby gets a severe rash, check with your pharmacist, they often make up special creams.
Bottles: Choose the right one for your baby, especially if you are breastfeeding (I chose the Medela). It will work out expensive, but will prevents nipple confusion if breastfeeding; it has a special design that ensures that baby uses the same sucking motion as breastfeeding to get milk. Mommy tip: start giving expressed milk in a bottle no later than six weeks or you might struggle to get them to take a bottle at all.
Bottle steriliser: My sister and I have both used a microwave one and found it works really well; you just put a tiny bit of water in the bottom, pop it in the microwave for five minutes and voila, you have sterilised bottles.
Dummy steriliser
Baby bath, with stand: I got mine online, especially moulded for baby. It was great when she was little, but the moulded shapes are all just in the way now. So essentially we have only got six months use out of it. The value to me is in the stand (you don’t have to struggle to bend over a bath or basin). Many people bath baby in the big bath with them; the only reason I don’t is because bath time is the only 100 percent me time I get.
Washcloths: You should use a fresh one at every bath time. Anything that can hold the dirty bath water, including bath toys that don’t have proper seals to keep water out, carries bacteria.
Hooded towels
Pram: If you buy a travel system with car seat and pram, be sure to check the materials they are made of (not easy to do online!) I bought mine online and found it a little too hard for my liking; but it is a personal preference thing. A lot of moms prefer the slightly firmer materials as they are easier to wipe clean.
Car seat: Baby car seats should be rear-facing until baby is at least one years old. This can be extremely hard for moms with babies that don’t like the car. Two things I invested in that seem to have helped – a mirror that allows me to see her and her to see me and a more upright car seat.
A baby sleeping bag (which is safer than sleeping with blankets): Keep in mind there are winter and summer versions, so make sure you get the right one for your baby’s size.
Receiving blankets and swaddling blankets: I have dozens of blankets of different materials and sizes and I use them for everything.
Nappy bag: Keep in mind moms, this becomes your handbag too, so you might want to treat yourself to a nice one.
Dummies: Remember though, not all babies take to dummies.
Formula: I would recommend buying a small tin of hypoallergenic formula in case of emergency. If for any reason you can’t get baby to feed at three am, you will be so glad you have something you can cup or syringe feed.
Medical and toiletry kit: This should include; a digital thermometer, nasal aspirator, blunt-ended scissors (use instead of clippers, less likely to cut baby fingers or toes), medicine dropper or syringes, surgical spirits, Infant Panado Drops (pain and fever: make sure you have this on hand for after vaccinations), something for teething (we have tried Teejel, Prodol, Pansoral and Ashton & Parsons), saline nasal spray (I use Sterimar), Colic mixture (I tried Telament drops, Gripe water, Buscopan, Bennetts and Gaviscon), hair brush and fine tooth comb (these often come in the medical kits), cotton wool or cotton pads (I prefer the pads as the wool often comes apart), cotton ear buds (get one box of the special baby ones, you will use it to clean the belly button with surgical spirits)

Baby clothing

Babygros: The best are the ones that are machine washable and anti-pill. I suggest checking that the buttons go all the way down both legs, my experience has been that it’s a nightmare to get the “one-leg” ones on and off a squirmy baby, especially at night.
Vests: Remember that baby needs one layer more than you need to be warm at all times.
Bibs: Choose ones with buttons as opposed to velcro as the velcro can be scratchy. These will save you having to change babygros constantly because of spit up or drool.
Booties or socks
Hats: Baby’s lose a lot of heat from their heads and cannot regulate their own body temperatures, so it is useful to have a few of these even when the weather is warm.
Mittens: These are to stop babies from scratching themselves (their nails grow so fast and are insanely sharp)
Newborn sized clothes: You need a few of these outfits. Depending on baby’s size they move to the 1-3 month size at about one month.

For mom

Breast pads: You will be horrified by how many of these you use. You should technically change them at every feed (at least), as leaving them damp can cause infection leading to mastitis – which I had and you do NOT want. Better safe than sorry.
Breast pump
Maternity pads: Post pregnancy bleeding lasts approximately six weeks for most new moms. It can be quite bad the first three weeks, but then it is like a normal period. The maternity pads are far more comfortable than regular pads and you can’t use tampons at all for this bleeding.
Nipple cream: The sisters at the hospital recommended Bepanthan, which is also a baby bum cream. It is expensive; but it works very well. Start using the cream after every feed from the very first feed. Cracked nipples are VERY common in the first week while you and baby are trying to learn how to latch properly and it is painful.
Feeding Bras: Try get a feeding bra for every day. You wear bras 24/7 from the day you start feeding, so comfortable ones that you can sleep in are a must. Also your breasts may leak through the breast pads and breastmilk smells awful. This mommy stuff is NOT glamorous.
Breastfeeding tops: If you invest in maternity wear, try find items that you will be able to feed with after. That way the investment is well worth it.

Other baby items

Baby swing: Some people swear by these (my sister included). My little girl hated hers so it was a waste of money for us.
Baby wrap (carrier): Again, a highly recommended item that most babies love and most of the moms I know could not live without. It makes baby feel safe and close to you while allowing you to use your hands (you will not believe what a luxury that becomes). Most of my mom friends could only get their babies to sleep in the day using these.
Play mat: This is a big, but very worthwhile investment. They are bright coloured and are great for teaching baby reaching skills, as well as for making tummy time (which most babies hate at first) fun.
Teething rings
Comforter or security blanket: I only invested in one of these recently, which I regret. My baby girl is now attached to the ratty towelling nappies I use as burp cloths which are very big, so I don’t like to let her keep them when she sleeps. She seems to be accepting her new comforter, but I would recommend getting baby something that is safe earlier so they have an appropriate self-soothing object.
Books: Plastic, cloth and cardboard small books. Keep an eye out for specials as these are expensive and you will need them earlier than you might think.

About the Author: Mandy Lee Miller is a writer, wife and first time mom to Charlotte Rose (Charly) as of 10 February 2014. She shares her experiences with other mommies and mommies-to-be and on her blog, Pregnant in Cape Town.