Sleep training: What you need to know before you start!

Most sleep deprived parents will be ready to try anything to get a good night’s sleep. Most likely you are holding onto the hope that you can change your little ones unhealthy sleep habits without resorting to letting him cry.

The good news is that sleep training does not have to mean leaving your baby to cry for hours on end on his own.

All methods of sleep training entail some fussing and crying. You are teaching your baby a new skill and breaking old expectations.

While some crying is unavoidable the ‘Crying it out’ method is not advisable, as it can make your baby feel abandoned and emotionally insecure.

The goal of sleep training is not only to teach your baby to sleep through the night but, to teach your baby to fall asleep independently and to put himself back to sleep should he wake during the night.

Because babies pass through light sleep states every 45 minutes at night (up to an hour in toddlers), it is not possible to prevent your baby stirring at night (due to sleep cycles) but it is possible for you to teach your baby to go back to sleep without your assistance.

This means that you will give him a chance to see if he can put himself to sleep (or back to sleep). By not leaving your baby on his own for long periods of time and by portraying a message of consistency and confidence your baby will feel secure not abandoned.

When controlled crying for sleep training is done in the correct manner to meet your child’s needs on all levels, especially his emotional needs, there should be no negative effects whatsoever – in fact a well-rested child with well-rested parents plays an important part of creating a loving and secure home.

Have the courage to be firm, without guilt or fear that your baby will resent or love you less.

Before you start:

• Decide on an appropriate time to begin
• Rule out medical causes of night waking
• Ensure your baby’s diet is adequate for his age, with sufficient milk and age appropriate solid food
• Your baby’s sleep zone must support sleep and be a consistent and calming environment.
• Encourage a comfort object (dummy, soft toy)
• A consistent bedtime routine is an excellent way of preparing your baby for sleep.
• If you are both working, arrange for a days leave on either end of your weekend, to allow consistent time to change the unhealthy sleep habits.
• Try to rest during the day as it essential that you are rested for the night ahead. If you are not prepared, you will be more likely to give up or be inconsistent out of sheer exhaustion.
• If possible, take shifts with your partner to allow you to have some undisturbed sleep somewhere along the line to recharge!
• If you have other children or demands, try to elicit help and support from other care-givers for the first few days, so that you can invest sufficient time and energy into the programme. Reassure your other children that you will make it up to them later – don’t forget to do this!
• Earmark a reward for yourself at the end of it all

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Ann Richardson

Qualified nurse and midwife Ann Richardson, co-author of Baby Sense, Sleep Sense and author of Toddler Sense, all bestsellers, has worked in the midwifery and paediatric fields for over 30 years. Ann has been in private practice for the past 22 years, and introduced the first private well-baby clinics, now a well-known phenomenon at Doctors’ rooms and pharmacies across the country.Passionate about her work and dedicated to ensuring that parents have the necessary knowledge to enjoy and rejoice in their children, she regularly lectures to both professionals and parents on various baby and childcare issues, in particular the effects of the sensory system on infant behaviour, and the management of sleeping disorders. Her specialisation is the treatment of “difficult babies and toddlers”, in particular those with feeding and sleeping disorders.She is a regular contributor to childcare publications, TV and radio. Ann is married with two daughters, and lives and practices in Johannesburg.

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